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Thursday, May 27, 2004

takes my breath away

this is a beautiful song that patti sang during the concert...incidentally, the song is also called the "pacey and joey" song of dawson's creek...it was the first time that i heard them sing it, and right away, i fell in love with it...i downloaded a version from my napster and played the song over and over again...

a while ago, around 9:30, a very good friend of mine called me up, sounding very ecstatic...as usual, girl talk...while talking, i brought the wireless phone near the computer's speakers, and i let her listen to the music i was playing. almost instantly after the song, she fell in love with it...in fact, she was mesmerized by the golden voice of patti, and tuck's exquisite plucking! the song reminded her of the date she had today...and she told me this:

"...i went to bed with him, knowing that he doesn't have feelings for me...well, nothing more of a friend...but you know why? because i love him in all of his beauty...i love him unconditionally...should his memory fail him and forget about me, i have decided to gather memories of him...up until when, i don't know...in the end, that's everything i can own of him...nothing but memories"

for this gentleman, whoever you are...this is your song...

TAKES MY BREATH AWAY

Sometimes, it amazes me
How strong the power of love can be.
Sometimes you just take my breath away.
You watch my love grow like a child,
Sometimes gentle and sometimes wild.
Sometimes you just take my breath away.
And it's too good to slip by, it's too good to lose,
Too good to be there just to use. I
'm gonna stand on a mountaintop and tell the news,
That you take my breath away.

Your beauty is there in all I see,
And when I feel your eyes on me, oooh,
Don't you know you just take my breath away.
'Say, my life is yours, my heart will be
Singing for you eternally.
Oh, don't you know you just take my breath away.

'Say, it's too good to slip by, and it's too good to lose,
Too good to be there just to use.
I'm gonna stand on a mountaintop and tell the news,
That you take my breath away.

Sometimes, it amazes me
how strong the power of love can be.
Ooooh, don't you know you just take my,
take my breath away.
Oh, my life is yours, my heart will be
Singing for you eternally.
Ooooh, don't you know you just take my,
take my breath away.
'Say, it's too good to slip by, and it's too good to lose,
Too good to be there just to use.

I'm gonna stand on a mountaintop and tell the news,
That you take my breath away. Hmmmm.....

Monday, May 24, 2004

Love Without Conditions - Benediction

There is only One Son of God
and You are He.

From Him, you receive.
To Him, you give.

When you look at yourself,
may you remember.

When you look at your brother,
may you also remember.

When you look away in fear,
remember only this:

Subject and Object,
Lover and Beloved,

are not two,
but one and the same.

What you give and
what you receive

are reflectionsof each other.
~Paul Ferrini

Sunday, May 23, 2004

solitude

when the night is calm...

and the birds are asleep...

trees bow and stars shine,

in solitude, i weep...

for that is the time i most think of you.

jersey girl

oh, this is a movie i've seen twice, two days in a row...this is the 3rd time in my entire life that i sought to watch a movie again (first time was for the movie Zapped!...and 2nd was for My Best Friend's Wedding...i wonder why...).

it's a touching story of a man (Ben Affleck) whose wife (whom he loved dearly despite her quirks) passed away after giving birth to his one and only daughter...but i will not write about the story of this man in relation to his daughter...i wish to write about his eccentric love interest, the girl who worked at the video shop (Liv Tyler)...

funny how they got to know each other...ben was in the video shop with his daughter...he sneaked out a porn video, tried to hide it from his daughter, and finally, checked it out with no other than the shop manager played by liv...liv questioned his "borrowing practices" as she claimed to be a graduate student who's doing a paper on "porn borrowing practices of men"...she invited ben to an interview just so she can have inputs on her paper...in the process, she discovered that ben has not had sex for the past 7 years! she took pity on him and casually invited him to have sex in his house! although a bit hesitant, ben agreed to the generous "offer"...boy, wasn't he depraved! as they got into the house, they undressed each other on the way to the bedroom, started kissing intensely and groping for each other's body parts, when suddenly, ben's daughter came home from school!..the two went inside the bathroom, closed the shower curtain, and pretended to be taking a bath...eventually, the girl caught them (there's really nothing you can hide from these little adults...)...

though liv played an eccentric and overly assertive young woman, there was a part in the movie when she casually faced the man, withheld her true feelings for him (she told him that it was just a "mercy job" she did, and that it was plain and casual sex...no feelings involved...)...as soon as she was alone, she found herself crying bitterly, letting out emotions that only she could understand at that point in time...tsk, tsk...i'm afraid, i've been in and out of that kind of situation too...trying to hide any sign of vulnerability in the face of a potential love interest...

to all the men out there: women do not engage in sex just because...sex is never just a physical activity meant to satisfy hormonal uproar...no matter how casual it may seem, women can't settle for "wham, bam,thank you ma'am!"...women will always refer to "it" as intimacy, not just sex...the difference is in the involvement of emotions in the former that can even result to love...unfortunately, not too many men are aware of this...the average Juana will still opt to cry in silence...

what am i driving at?

men, please treat your women with respect...emotions will always tag along, no matter what you say...it's like a curse that we, women, cannot do away with...so the tendency is to get hurt most of the time...all the time...so please, never think of sex as a casual undertaking, a boost to one's ego, or simply a time to scratch an itch given a favorable time, place...and partner.

tuck & patti LIVE!

after several attempts of asking people to tag along with me to watch the tuck & patti concert, finally, by sheer accident (thanks to blogger.com!), i found someone who's equally dying to find someone to accompany him...sir rolly :)

this is what i've been waiting for...i've been a fan for 11 years now, and there was never a time that i found remakes to be more beautiful than the original...the all time favorite TIME AFTER TIME, an original by cyndi lauper, was reinvented by this duo some 11 years ago...and this time, they've come up with a not so similar version, but nontheless, equally beautiful...who says a last-song-syndrome is annoying? not when you sing the way patti would...

last night's performance was utterly magnificent! tuck's performance was breathtaking! the way he strummed and plucked would make one imagine of a guiter with strings set wide apart...each and every single note struck with extreme clarity, you'd think he's some sort of a demigod! he played like a string quartet, only there was just the sound of one guitar that filled the theater with awesome acoustic melody. when he strummed and tapped away on his guitar with his own rendition of EUROPA, for a while there, i forgot that Carlos Santana even existed! sir rolly's nagging question was..."is he human?" hahahaha! well, that fleshy but firm handshake must have answered him alright!

Patti's voice was soulful and soooo soothingly beautiful that when she sang I Was Born To Love You, someone from the audience proposed marriage to his companion! It was indeed a romantic evening...each song beguiled couples to snuggle, share a shawl in a cold and rainy night...hehehe...good thing that sir rolly's a gentleman...that even when he was sooo darn freezing, he just tugged on the other end of my shawl which i offered him to share :)

oh well...i hope to see the duo again perform live...this time, in San Francisco!

Friday, May 21, 2004

maiden voyage

it's been quite a while since i finally resolved to write a blog...again...but have not really found the right motivation to do it...i guess, there are just too many significant things that have happened recently that i couldn't help but sit down and start typing along.

today, i woke up this morning, feeling so heavy, as i was burdened with guilt for hurting a good friend's feelings...why? i have questioned his integrity as a friend when all this time, he has shown nothing but kindness and respect...i guess it all stemmed out from the fact that he never disclosed to me what his true intentions were...at least, not in a concise manner...

what was my issue?..i didn't know what his intentions were in wanting to have an immigrant's status in the US...i've offered to extend a little privilege to him, expecting nothing in return, just so he will be able to experience this "new life" that he's been longing for in a foreign land...i offered to help because i care for him...

anyway, since i knew that what i did was something really, really bad (dahil hindi pa raw ipinapanganak ang taong makakapikon sa kanya...so, i guess, i took the first shot at it), i apologized through text (texting can be sooo annoying because of the absence of real emotions...yet, the filipino race seems to be so dependent on it)...hiyang-hiya ako...and he replied: "...hi! gud morning! it's not that i dont want to go, di ba i said i'm 95% sure (yeah right!). kaya lang i felt sa txt mo that u'r not clear abt my intentions & that i may jst be using u. i dont want u to entertain thos thots kc it wil jeopardize our friendshp kaya i said wag na lang. yun lang naman. but if dat's not wat u meant & it was meant to be in jest, then cge let's continue. di ba? unles ikaw yung nagbago?..."

well, although i felt better after reading that, i still prodded him to tell me honestly if he's sure that there were no more hard feelings for me...and he assured me that "...when a friend apologizes to me, i hav no reason 2 question her/his sincerity..." after that, i felt so good i was smiling the entire day!

my friend Martin (not his real name) is the epitome of a real gentleman...the things that he said to me today, are all reflective of a person who's nature is to nurture...

i'm happy to have known Martin as he gives me a new perspective in life...now, i'm starting to believe that not all men are jerks...that there is still innate goodness in most people...that it is alright to go out and start trusting men again...that it is not alright to settle for just anything, specially if it is so obnoxious, thinking that getting used to it is a normal part of living...something obnoxious is bad enough...to think that it's alright to have it just because one is obliged to have or live with it, is simply preposterous! i am happy to have met Martin...i liken myself to a ship that's about to sail for the first time...it's maiden voyage...i'm going to sail on through life with a vision in mind and heart that i can redeem myself and do better as a person...new life is about to berth and i'm rarin' to go on board :)