I like writing online...aside from pouring out my emotions and things that just happen to tickle my innermost thoughts, there's a number of things that I need to jot down as they start to crowd my head in sheer discombobulation ...as i rethink them, i edit, copy, paste, crop... use words befitting the characters, edit all i want...in my own sweet time...this is my private portal and I love it!
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
a place i can call home
it's august and now i'm on my second month here at our apartment (our, i.e. Will and myself). and even if we're only renting this place, i've been looking forward to coming home everyday. it's a bit strange because i've always regarded my parents' house as my home. in fact, while i was still married and lived independently (well, quite) with my ex and my daughter, i always thought that my homing device still sought for mom and dad.
marriage, i supposed to have given me my independence because my parents had let me deal with life's "complexities" on my own. they didn't encroach in my affairs nor question my decisions. i was on my own, felt alone and even thought they abandoned me. so it seemed that my only choice was to toughen up, be reponsible for my choices, accept what my ex and his parents planned to build...and regard it as my new home.
i thought i stepped in with the right foot. needless to say, i found out later that i treaded the wrong path. i tried to fit in a place that someone else created for me. however, as i have always said, i was a square peg in a round hole. it took me a while before i realized the oddity, but as God is my ally, He led me to find my place. here, in this little apartment, in this beautiful city, is where i feel it is.
approximately 3 miles away from the beach, the apartment is our little haven. it has an awesome view (the man-made lake at our frontyard has a calming effect), recreation areas and albeit the jet noise, the whole complex is nice and quiet most of the time. the unit itself is big enough for both of us. we try to make it clean and cozy, and with a lot of help from our friends and Will's family, pretty much we have all the stuff that we need. here are a few pictures that i took (with my aged motorola V3x) on our move in day:
the view from the living room
our fire place
our frontyard, by the dining area
after a day of hard work, the best thing about going home is enjoying the relaxing company of a loved one. and since we moved in, i've been looking forward to that every single day :)